When we thought this health crisis might last just a few months, we psyched ourselves up to cope with it, says Paul Nestadt, MD, assistant professor in the department of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine in Baltimore. “Now that we understand there’s no definitive end, that is causing widespread ‘pandemic fatigue.’” By “pandemic fatigue,” Dr. Nestadt is referring to the exhaustion you may be feeling after months of spending extra time and energy dealing with our new pandemic lifestyle and all the struggles it’s brought on. You may have lost loved ones or jobs. You may have missed out on experiences and life milestones, like graduations, weddings, and funerals. You may be feeling cooped up or cut off from usual hobbies. You may be tired of the safety protocols that take extra time. You may be feeling tired of trying to make “good use” of this time. “If I hear one more time that Shakespeare wrote King Lear while in quarantine during a pandemic, I’m going to lose it,” he says. It’s more likely you’re feeling worn out given the big and small strains we’re all facing. Being mentally and physically exhausted tends to lower resilience and boost feelings of dread and helplessness. But because you’re exhausted and your ability to cope may be lowered, you’re less motivated to do anything about those negative feelings. So you end up feeling more on edge, anxious, and exhausted by all of those feelings. (It’s one of the well-known consequences of chronic stress.) It’s a vicious cycle, Nestadt says. RELATED: 20 Tips for Boosting and Cultivating Resilience Our more confined, less social lifestyles are certainly adding to the problem, adds Alyza Berman, a licensed clinical social worker and founder and clinical director of The Berman Center, a mental health treatment center in Atlanta. Isolation and loneliness can be stressful. But it can also be challenging to spend so much work and leisure time with partners, family members, or roommates. “From what I’ve seen with my clients, everyone is feeling smothered and overwhelmed,” she says — including couples. There are fewer options for personal space and having your own routines. “It’s not that they don’t love each other; they just never expected to be so inseparable,” she says. Time apart to pursue individual interests can make a relationship stronger because it feels empowering and nourishing, which translates into more confidence among individuals within a relationship. When people don’t have “me time,” that’s when you might feel emotionally claustrophobic, Berman explains. And it’s important to acknowledge that some communities (including ones defined by industry, geographic area, race, and more) have been hit harder than others by the crisis in terms of economic implications and lives lost. Some Americans have had to cope more intimately than others with recent devastating wildfires and hurricanes, social unrest, and hunger crises. Bearing an unequal share of the burden can be tough to cope with, especially if you’re feeling isolated at the same time, Nestadt says. RELATED: Black Americans Have Been Hit Hardest by COVID-19 — Here’s Why And there’s a lot of divisiveness in the political landscape right now. It’s exhausting, Nestadt says. “We don’t exactly feel a sense of cohesion with each other right now in our society.” It doesn’t help that there’s no defined endpoint for these problems, Nestadt adds. If we knew of one, we might be better able to pace our stress, he explains. “Without that, it’s just much harder.” In April, respondents reported followed these measures about 70 percent of the time. By June adherence dropped to the high 50s, and increased slightly to an average of 60 percent by Thanksgiving. The decrease was consistent across every region in the country. The rules Americans were most likely to report having given up on were staying at home except for essential activities, having no close contact with non–household members, not having visitors at their homes, and avoiding eating at restaurants. “It’s disconcerting that protective behaviors overall have become relatively stable no matter what the national state of COVID-19 prevalence is. Given new, more transmissible variants of the virus that are arising globally, we really might need greater adherence to keep people safe,” the study’s lead author, Matthew Crane, a second-year medical student at the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, said in a press release.
Feeling Like You’ve Had It? Here’s What to Do About It
These tips won’t make COVID-19 go away. But they may help you better cope with some of the stressors you’re facing.
1. Adjust Expectations as Needed
If you started quarantine with high expectations of all the things you would accomplish with all of your “extra” time — learn French, start baking your own bread, finally pen that novel — don’t be afraid to take those things off your “to-do” list. Having high expectations of what you “should be doing” can be a major source of internal friction if you’re not meeting them, Nestadt says. Do stay active, work, and pursue hobbies that lift your mood and keep you energized — all of those are helpful for fighting the ennui, suggests Nestadt. Skip the things that are stressing you out. And if you’re part of the essential or reopened workforce that is back at it in person, you’re likely coping with a whole lot of extra safety precautions and protocols just to do the same things you did before. Do give yourself a break! RELATED: Self-Care Tips for Taking Care of You During a Global Pandemic
2. Set Boundaries With the People in Your Household
In terms of relationships with your significant other, kids, roommates, or anyone else in your feeling-too-snug living space, Berman suggests putting some boundaries in place. It might even be literal: You can rearrange a living space so everyone has a separate area they use for alone time.
3. Add Some Structure to Your Days
Create a separation between day and evening, especially if you’re working from home and/or doing home schooling, Berman says. Your routine may include getting dressed for work, kissing your spouse and kids “goodbye” for the day (or the morning), creating date nights, designating family game nights, scheduling your exercise, taking frequent breaks, or planning leisure activities like movie watching or holiday decorating, even if it’s with the same people you’ve seen every day for months. Too much structure can be suffocating. Some structure can help make you feel more in control and give you a sense of what’s coming next. RELATED: Your Work-From-Home Survival Guide for Self-Care
4. Prioritize Self-Care, Especially Sleep
Focusing on healthy self-care behaviors — eating your veggies, exercising, staying connected with friends, avoiding “doomscrolling” — can all go a long way toward feeling more grounded. One of the biggest self-care priorities should be sleep, adds Kenneth Wright, PhD, professor of integrative physiology at the University of Colorado Boulder and director of the Sleep and Chronobiology Laboratory there. “Insufficient sleep duration and changes in sleep schedules are very common right now,” he says. It can affect mood and immune health. Sticking to a sleep routine can also help lower stress and keep you feeling energized throughout the day, bolstering the resiliency that might have been dwindling otherwise. RELATED: How to Get Better Sleep Tonight
5. Get Help if and When You Need It
Also, if you feel like you could benefit from professional help, find a therapist, Nestadt says. Most are doing telehealth appointments right now, he adds, and you may need just a few sessions or even one to feel like you’re getting a reset. “Pandemic fatigue is real, and the way it affects you will likely be unique because you have a specific set of challenges,” he says. “It can feel like too much. And sometimes, just acknowledging that can help.” RELATED: How to Build Resilience During the COVID-19 Pandemic With additional reporting by Carmen Chai.